Mr. Apologized-First — The Harder Text

Lyrics

Eleven thirteen.
The kitchen light is off.
Just the blue glare from the phone in my hand.
It feels heavier than it did this morning.

The words from three hours ago, still hanging in the air.
Sharp edges.
A slammed door.
The silence that came after is louder.
My thumb keeps scrolling, past photos, past old jokes.
Looking for a way back.
The part of me that's dug in, the part that knows I was right...
...is sitting here alone.

But someone has to go second on pride.
So the friendship can go first.
Someone has to build the bridge back from the other side.
With the harder words.
Take the lower position.
Just for a minute.
To keep the whole thing from breaking.

The cursor blinks. A patient, silver line.
"Hey."
Delete.
"Listen, about before..."
Delete.
Twenty-three seconds for a normal text.
This one is taking a lifetime.
I'm not saying I was wrong.
I'm saying... I miss my friend.
Is that the first brick?

Yeah, someone has to go second on pride.
So the friendship can go first.
Someone has to build the bridge back from the other side.
With the harder words.
Take the lower position.
Just for a minute.
To keep the whole damn thing from breaking.

And what am I holding onto so tight?
The victory? The last word?
I can have it. I can keep it.
And sleep with it tonight in a quiet house.
Or I can trade it.
For a phone call tomorrow.
For next Tuesday at the bar.
For the years we banked before this.

My thumb finds the button.
It's sent.
I turn the phone over on the table.
The blue light is gone.
I can hear the refrigerator hum again.
I went first.