The Feeling of Choice Stayed

Lyrics

[Intro]


[Verse 1]
The corridor was an index of itself. Polished floors reflecting a ceiling that was also a floor. Ahead, the sign just said EXIT in plain silver letters. Every step I took, the door took two steps back. The walls breathed, pages of a book I was running through, the ink still wet. My feet didn't make a sound, they made a wake in the silent dust.

[Chorus]
And the door just keeps its distance.
A horizon made of chrome.
The more you run, the more you prove you aren't already home.
The hallway is the engine, and my panic is the fuel.

[Verse 2]
I held up my hand to check. A totem of flesh. It had the right number of fingers but they were casting the wrong number of shadows. Seven shadows from five fingers. I tried again, my hand was just a blur of light. The rules don't apply when the rules are the cage. The silver sign blinked. It didn't say EXIT anymore. It said INHALE.

[Chorus]
And the door just keeps its distance.
A horizon made of chrome.
The more you run, the more you prove you aren't already home.
The hallway is the engine, and my panic is the fuel.

[Bridge]
So I stopped. 
Just stood there. Between the mirrors reflecting mirrors of me stopping. Let the exit go. Closed my dream-eyes. And felt for the thread count. Not the floor, polished and impossibly cold. The other thing. Behind it. The cheap cotton of the sheet under my real cheek. The weight of the blanket. The faint hum of the world that waits.

[Outro]

My eyes opened. Grey light from the window. The clock read nothing I recognized. The dream was gone. But the stillness wasn't. I didn't run. I chose not to. And the feeling of choice stayed. That part was real. I took that part with me. The stillness. I chose.