Odes to Joy

A Verbal Fig Leaf · Track 24 · middle

Silent Flute

Silent Flute (1720s) — An instrument that plays without sound. The gentlest one here. VOLUME: III. THE TAVERN, 1700–1899. THE DODGE THIS ERA: The dodge becomes CLASS. Grose writes the Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue and suddenly there are two vocabularies: the one for the parlour and the one for the taproom. The joke is which room you are in. Sing the AVOIDANCE, never the anatomy.

No audio yet — generation pending.

Lyrics

[Intro]

[Verse 1]
Below the stairs, the pewter mugs are banging,
The magistrate is chalking up his debt.
A heavy sort of syllables are hanging,
A lexicon of sawdust and of breath.
I wipe three drops of arrack from my cuff,
And leave the laughing fellows by the fire.
The language of the dining room is rough,
But parlor rooms demand a little higher.

[Chorus]
I offer up the silent flute instead.
No brass to wake the spaniel on the rug.
A man must measure everything he says,
And leave the country manners in the jug.
It takes no wind to play this melody,
Just quiet time, and your company.

[Verse 2]
You sit beside the mantel with your lace,
Expecting an amusement for the hearth.
A taproom phrase would only leave a trace
Of muddy boots upon the woven path.
A half-beat jump before the jaw can shut
I catch the vulgar noun and let it fade.
I smooth the heavy linen of my coat,
And offer up an instrument of shade.

[Chorus]
I offer up the silent flute instead.
No brass to wake the spaniel on the rug.
A man must measure everything he says,
And leave the country manners in the jug.
It takes no wind to play this melody,
Just quiet time, and your company.

[Bridge]
There is a dictionary for the street,
A vocabulary for the wooden chair.
But when a fellow regulates his heat,
He doesn't drag the alley up the stair.
The boys below are shouting at the glass,
But we are bound by silence and by class.

[Outro]
I play it for the drawing room alone.
No need to press the stops or strike a key.
Just listen to the air.

We’ll leave the coarser music where it sleeps.

Just you and me.
Pick a song