The Dirtiest Album Ever Recorded* — Vol 3 (Finale) · Track 17 · closer
Often
PARODY, laundered-double-entendre album (Vol 3, the finale). Write ORIGINAL wholesome lyrics that SOUND suggestive from the title but are LITERALLY and innocently about a well-loved frequent-buyer punch card at the corner coffee shop. The dirty mind is the listener's — the song is clean, DistroKid/YouTube-safe, G-to-PG. Vintage register to era. ⛔ CRITICAL COPYRIGHT RULE: do NOT reproduce, quote, or lightly paraphrase the source song's CHORUS/HOOK or ANY distinctive lyric line (even the famous tag line). Suno's filter WILL reject it and it creates real copyright liability. Borrow ONLY the general TITLE idea. Invent a completely fresh hook about a well-loved frequent-buyer punch card at the corner coffee shop. Source parodied (idea only, never its words): Often (2014).
Lyrics
The front window's fogged up again. Just like yesterday morning. It’s 7:15 AM. I wouldn't have it any other way. This is my place. Tucked in my wallet, right behind my driver's license... I keep a special little card. It's a bit dog-eared now. The corners have gone soft. The ink has bled a little from that time in October when it rained. I smooth it out on the worn wooden counter. Nine perfect little coffee beans, all stamped in a row. Stamped in that faded purple ink. Just one more empty circle left to go. Yeah, I do this often. You know my spot, you know my time. I slide it right across to you, and you always smile. Just give me one more punch, and the next one's mine. You know I do this often. It happens all the time. You always have the stamp ready. That little purple ink pad is waiting. You know just how I like it when you press it down. Firm and right in the center, no hesitating. I love that little sound it makes. A solid, satisfying little thud. Another step closer to what I came here for. Another little piece of my day, understood. Yeah, I do this often. You know my spot, you know my time. I slide it right across to you, and you always smile. Just give me one more punch, and the next one's mine. You know I do this often. It happens all the time. Some people chase excitement. They want big thrills and neon lights. But me, I find my comfort right here. In these quiet, familiar morning rites. This little piece of paper tells a story. Of early Mondays, and long Wednesdays, and rainy Fridays. A story told in ten small parts. And the ending, the tenth one... it's always the sweetest part. You fill the last one. You flip it over. "Congratulations," you say with a grin. You take my new card... And give me that first punch, to begin it all again. Yeah. I'll be back tomorrow. I do this... often.